Britney Spears is talking for the first time about a widely publicized 2007 mental breakdown that led to her hospitalization. She says anxiety was at the root of her problem, caused by the constant feeling that she was being judged and tested by everyone.
She says the expectations began at an early age and caused her to be “overwhelmed” by the smallest things.
“From an early age I always felt that everyone was testing me,” said the 35-year-old pop star.
“If [something] was not in place, it would have been enough to get me to this point of anxiety. I could get overwhelmed by a lot of very small, disproportionate things.”
Now she says she has stopped judging herself and take the breaks as they come.
“I think I had to give myself more breaks through my career and take responsibility for my mental health. There were many decisions that were made for me and that I didn’t make myself …” she told an Israeli newspaper.
“I think I was a different person then, young, and I did not always know instinctively what was good and what was wrong,” she explains.
“I am in a much better place in my life, and the two children shaped my personality, filled me, made me less worried about what is happening to me,” she added.
Spears has two sons Sean Preston, 11, and Jayden James, 10, with her ex-husband Kevin Federline.
In fact, her self-confidence has improved so much, she was able to make the first move with boyfriend Sam Asghari.
“We were waiting and waiting together for 20 minutes at a time, literally stuck there, [while filming the video]. We were forced to talk to each other,” she says.
“He doesn’t really know me as a person, and I have no idea who the hell he is, and we were just talking.
“I kept his number, and it was so weird because it was like five months later that I found his number in my bag. I was like ‘He was really cute. This guy was really cute!’ so then I called him. He is just a really fun, funny person.”
In March, Spears announced that she would take her Las Vegas residency show on the road in a world tour. She’s currently performing in Israel.
The singer is also reportedly busy recording her ninth studio album.